


Audrey The Vampire Slayer

by steampunkmagic



Category: Haven - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire Slayer, Gen, Original Audrey, The Hellmouth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-01
Updated: 2014-09-01
Packaged: 2018-02-15 16:17:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2235426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/steampunkmagic/pseuds/steampunkmagic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Life on the Hellmouth is hard, especially when the Hellmouth is in Haven.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Audrey The Vampire Slayer

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tassos](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tassos/gifts).



> For the troublesfest prompt : the one where Original Audrey is (or dreams of being) a vampire slayer (in or out of one of her romance novels) (or why she loves the novels)
> 
> This was such a fun idea I just had to write something.

                Haven High had plenty of the problems usually associated with American public schools such as: Algebra II, mysterious cafeteria food, and vicious cheerleaders.  It also had plenty of unusual problems too. Namely, it was smack dab on top of a Hellmouth.

                Why anyone would build a school - or a town for that matter - on top of an entrance to a demon dominion was anyone's guess.  But despite the ludicrousness of the whole thing the small town of Haven existed - and continued to exist - all the while being infested with every creature that went bump in the night. 

                For Audrey Parker this fact was especially hard to deal with.  She was the Slayer, the Chosen One, the one girl in all the world …, and all the other things her Watcher Chief Wournos liked repeating.  In short it was her job to kill the forces of darkness before they killed everyone else.  That's what it meant to be a Slayer.

                It also meant having the majority of the school thinks she is crazy, never having a date, and skipping a lot of classes.  Today was no exception.

                Jordan and her crew of perfectly dressed rich girls passed Audrey in the locker hallway, pausing only long enough to insult her worn tennis shoes and to ask if Nathan had given up on his charity project yet.

                Audrey imagined how easy it would be to pick up the skinny raven-haired girl and throw her down the hall.  She would probably even hit the trophy case. 

                "Wow what an original burn." Her voice dripped sarcasm as Audrey slammed her locker closed.  "How long did it take you to think of that one?"

                Jordan and her Guard (Guard of what? Nail polish? Rumors?) raised their noses and marched off without responding. 

                "You meet the nicest people here." A voice remarked dryly from behind her.

                "Duke."  Audrey spun around to greet one of the only two friends she had at Haven High.  "You weren't in Mr. Teagues class."

                The roguish upperclassmen smirked.  "I felt my education was better perfected outside the hallowed halls of the institution this morning."

                She raised an eyebrow.  "You mean like in a closet with Jennifer somewhere?"

                Duke clasped a hand to his chest melodramatically.  "You wound me with your cynicism."

                Audrey chuckled rolling her blue eyes heavenward.  "Come on, apparently The Chief found something he's got to show us."

 

 

 

 

                Slipping off campus during a free period (well, _she_ had a free period anyway) was remarkably easy - especially when all you did was walk across the street the Haven's tiny police station.  People never questioned when you went into a police station, since most people tended to avoid them. 

                Chief Wournos had been Audrey's Watcher for nearly two years now, and though the 17 year old repeatedly defeated vampires, demons with killer shadows, and the occasional zombie horde, he still seemed convinced she was incompetent.  Audrey figured it would take thwarting an apocalypse to make the man smile. 

                The Chief's son, Nathan, sat across from him in the small office filled floor to ceiling with ancient tomes and strange objects.  Her maybe/kinda/possibly boyfriend smiled when Audrey slipped in and completely ignored Duke.  The two boys - for reasons she could not fathom other than their general maleness - often pretended that they did not like each other.  Her friends were idiots, but they were _her_ idiots and they followed her into any situation no matter how freaky without question.

                Haven had a lot of freaky. 

                "Is the end nigh?" Duke grinned to annoy the Watcher. 

                The Chief glanced up from his books looking grimmer than usual, if that were possible.  "Yes."

                "Yes?" Audrey crossed her arms, blonde ponytail swinging in irritation.  "Care to elaborate?"

                Nathan handed her his own book, which appeared to primarily be in Latin.  "Driscoll is trying to rip apart reality.  There's a planetary alignment tomorrow night he can use to bleed the nightmare world into this one."

                This town sucked (pun intended).

                 "You mean our nightmares will become real?" After seeing the things she had Audrey's nightmares were the last thing Haven needed coming to life.

                Nathan nodded, his gray eyes looking her over with concern.  He knew what she was thinking, but would not say anything in front of his dad. 

                "Okay, how do we stop it?" Duke interjected.  "Because if killer clowns start roaming the streets, I'm sorry guys, but I'm moving."

 

 

 

 

                The plan was simple.   If the psychotic reverend could not perform the ritual during the hour of the planets' alignment then his plan would fail.  All they had to do was incapacitate him long enough.

                Reverend Driscoll headed a church of fanatics who firmly believed that humanity was being punished for its sins by all the monsters which plagued their little hamlet.  He wanted to punish the wicked so his righteous few might live.  It was the same song and dance as every other genocide promoting maniac. 

                Audrey had managed to stay under his radar mostly due to luck so far.  If the man had any idea what she really was he would burn her at the stake - American laws be damned. 

                Trying to push such thoughts of danger and impeding destiny from her mind, Audrey sat out in the shade in front of the school reading.  She was just getting lost in her book when someone - make that two someones - dropped down beside her. 

                "' _Unstake My Heart_ ', you've got to be kidding?" Duke said looking over her shoulder. 

                "Shut up." Audrey elbowed him in the ribs, turning red.  "At least I don't read Play Boy."

                Nathan snorted at Duke's scandalized expression.  "He's right though.  Those books are so unrealistic; no one knows that better than you."

                "That's the point." Audrey huffed shoving the offending novel back into her bag.  "Don't you think I wish vamps were sexy and mysterious rather than disgusting and always trying to kill me?  It's escapism."

                Both boys looked somewhat surprised by her response. 

                Audrey quickly changed the subject to something less embarrassing.  "I assume you interrupted me for a reason?"

                That got them going.  "We came up with the perfect distraction."

                Audrey could not help smiling as she listened to them argue over the finer points of their 'covert operation'.  Life in Haven was hard, but her friends maked it worth it.

                "Where in hell are we supposed to get firecrackers?"  She laughed breaking them up. 

                Duke just shot her a knowing smile.  "Let me worry about that."


End file.
